So, who else is in love with the It Gets Better Project?? For those who do not know, this project was started in the wake of a number of suicides committed by gay teens in the United States. Today has been designated as a day to wear purple in honor of those teens and of LGBT youth who continue to be senselessly attacked. My heart goes out to them. I may still be quite young, but I do believe that adults are in a position to step up for these kids and send the message that it is OKAY for them to be who they are.
I once read an essay by Mark Hagland about his experience as both an adult Korean adoptee and a gay man. He made some connections which I found rather interesting. A quote: "Gay men and lesbians face the same conundrum: like transracial adoptees, they find themselves compelled to consciously construct an identity, often struggling through isolation and confusion to reach clarity and peace." I only speak for myself when I say that I think he has a point. There are times when I feel keenly aware of my adoptee identity. I certainly don't have it all figured out and still go through periods of feeling confused/alone. The whole deal about having to explain myself gets old. In a way, TRAs continually 'come out' to new people in their lives. I don't tell every new person I meet or date that, "Hey, just so you know, I was adopted by white people, so I hope you don't expect me to be culturally Asian." But, really, how do you tell people that? Do you need to tell them? I ran into a similar issue growing up in a single parent household and having to explain to teachers/friends as a small child that my dad was deceased. Heck, that's one I'm still working on, too! Life would just be easier if people stopped making assumptions so much. As for me, I'm still learning how to live in truth and how to react to the world around me in ways that preserve my sense of peace.
Oh! If you're interested, the Mark Hagland quote is from an essay he had published in the book Outsiders Within: Writing on Transracial Adoption. I HIGHLY recommend it! I hope to discuss that book more in-depth at a later time.